Stories with Deryn
by DarthSmiles
Summary: Now in semi-order, with 3 I am working on TBP, including the ending to the first two chapters. General stuff, usually goofy or depressing! Accepts challenges/prompts! On hiatis, will be editing.
1. The Central powers are the good guys

A/n:This is inspired by the song 'Dynamite', esp. the throw my hands in the air line. I obviously DO NOT OWN! I am a girl, for one thing, not a MAN! With that over with, thanks to Westerforemers Cyanrain, Ski, and especially tridecagirl, for the mechanical arm idea!

Yes I know I have 2 other stories going, but this is going to be a drabble seires, and I'll probably rotate which story to post.

* * *

This was it. The end of the war. Alek thought back to all he had been through, which admitting was not much in the past few months. He had escaped to Mexico(and learned that Spanish and German are _very_ different languages) with Dylan, and now that the Central Powers had the upper hand, he could finally stop the war, since all the other leaders had been assassinated, not having the good fortune to leave for Mexico.

No more death! He felt like jumping for joy, but he could not. It would be undiplomatic, but of course that didn't stop Dylan. Nothing ever stopped Dylan. His mum had died, but Dylan couldn't go to the funeral, since Dylan was supposedly a traitor. Dylan just kept on living, saying "If I go, we can't stop the war, causing millions more to die. If I wait 2 years, a million people will still be alive, and I will be able to see my mum's grave too. It is an obvious choice." Dylan's voice was always strangely high by the end of that much used sentence, but whose voice wouldn't be?

Anyhow, it looked strange to see a deserter wearing a middie's uniform and a mechanical arm and jumping up and down at the surrender of his home country's side. His mum's death must have knocked him slightly off his rocker, too. Alek started to smile, then stopped. He could not be seen as gloating or over-confident, or too calm and kowtowing.

"And why should we surrender, Arch-Duke Alekzander?" said King George V.

Alek answered, "I wouldn't look at this as surrender, more as an agreement to stop fighting. You will not have to pay us anything, in land or money, and you get peace. This agre-"

"-Basically, we end this barking war and move on with our bum-rag lives, with no strings attached. Really, this treaty is in your favor, the central powers are going to win really soon, and then there _will_ be strings attached. So stop this clart-filled talk and sign the treaty, so all of your soldiers can go home already!"

King George V looked positively scandalized. Trust Dylan to insult his king. But then an understanding washed over the kings face. "You show a lot of potential, um... Middshipman Dylan. Mabye we could get a job for you later? I have to say it is logical. But if we agree to this treaty, what assurance do we have that the Central powers will not attack us?"

Dylan, being Dylan, replied, "Because I'll torture Alek here if they don't."

"Wh-Wh-What?" came from King George V's mouth.

Alek felt sorry for King George V. Dealing with Dylan, who would have to be rewarded... Dylan could be a diplomat! He already knew a bit of German, and was friends with a ruler. "How about an exchange of diplomats, instead. And Dylan, this is a diplomatic peace talk."

Dylan said,"I know, but it is so barking _boring_. The diplomat idea sounds good, I can be a diplomat! I'm sure King Georgie here doesn't want me in his country much longer."

To this King George V laughed and said, "Yes, these talks are boring. The diplomat idea sounds wonderful. Dylan can be our diplomat. What about that Count friend of yours? He could be your diplomat. If you would kindly add in a clause about diplomats, I would be glad to sign it."

He had his assistant write the clause, and then he signed the document. He passed it to King George V. King George V signed it.

Now it was really over. Hallelujah! Dylan was jumping up and down frantically now. And know Dylan was... skipping? And _twirling_? And hurtling towards him? And jumping onto him? And kissing him full on the lips?

_And kissing him full on the lips_? What in the name of the Holy-Roman Empire?

* * *

Central powers: Clankers

Allied powers: Dawinists

Hee-Hee! Cliff hanger!

Thanks for reading! Will take requests, but no promises.


	2. King Georgie

I, King George the Fifth, am surrendering.

To a clanker. And a deserter, wearing a middies uniform, with a clanker arm, who was currently jumping up and down and looking very feminine... WHAT? I am surrendering, not looking to see if any of my deserter middies where cross-dressers. Surrendering. Giving up.

Why should I?

"And why should we surrender, Arch-Duke Alekzander?" I said.

Arch-duke Alekzander answered, "I wouldn't look at this as surrender, more as an agreement to stop fighting. You will not have to pay us anything, in land or money, and you get peace. This agre-"

"-Basically, we end this barking war and move on with our bum-rag lives, with no strings attached. Really, this treaty is in your favor, the central powers are going to win really soon, and then there _will_ be strings attached. So stop this clart-filled talk and sign the treaty, so all of your soldiers can go home already!" said that traitorous middie. Really, he was starting to grow on me. Maybe a job in the court would work. His logic made sence, but he missed one big point.

My face must have been looking strange, given the look on the Arch-Dukes face. So I decided to be friendly and say "You show a lot of potential, um... Midshipman Dylan. Maybe we could get a job for you later? I have to say it is logical. But if we agree to this treaty, what assurance do we have that the Central powers will not attack us?" Who knew what trick those devious clankers would pull.

Then the middie screamed, practically, "Because I'll torture Alek here if they don't."

"Wh-Wh-What?" What goes on in this middies mind? He is sure a strange one. Why on earth would he torture the leader of the world... and the Arch-duke did not even look flustered. Both scrambled in there attics, they were, because they were CLANKERS!

"How about an exchange of diplomats, instead. And Dylan, this is a diplomatic peace talk." That Arch-duke was a good diplomat. He would go far.

Midshipman Dylan said,"I know, but it is so barking _boring_. The diplomat idea sounds good, I can be a diplomat! I'm sure King Georgie here doesn't want me in his country much longer." GEORGIE? KING GEORGIE? How could I have ever considered hiring him? I must be going insane. I must not. I must be friendly. He rules the world. I must not go insane. I must be friendly.

So I had to laugh and say, "Yes, these talks are boring. The diplomat idea sounds wonderful. Dylan can be our diplomat. What about that Count friend of yours? He could be your diplomat. If you would kindly add in a clause about diplomats, I would be glad to sign it."

Arch-Duke Alek had his assistant write the clause, and then he signed the document. He passed it to me. I signed it. I must be insane. Submitting to the clankers?

But the war is over. My soldiers are safe, even if I am insane.

But now that middie is jumping, and skipping, and twirling, and _kissing the Arch-Duke on the lips?_ And I thought I was going insane.

* * *

This is in 1st person, which is different for me, but I thought it would displaly King Georgie well.

Still a cliff hanger... HAHA!

And thank you for reading!


	3. And the wrong side wonDiffent story

A different, darker story... No, Alek is not the father. Deryn's POV-going to be 2 chapters, most likely.

* * *

And the Wrong Side Won

* * *

"Mammy, why are there no fabs?"

"Shh! But to answer your question, the Central Powers won, banishing all fabs," Deryn said.

She was telling the story of The Great War, the war to end all wars, to her daughter Aileen. It was bed time, for Aileen at least. But this story was painful. There were no more fabs. Every one, killed. All because She couldn't kill Alek. But she couldn't tell. Too much hurt.

"Why did they win?" Ailleen was so innocent. They won't teach them about the end of the war in school, because that reason would taint the_ perfection_ of the Clankers. For a prince to take a commoner and have union with her, that was disgraceful. So she was the one in disgrace, because Alek, the emperor, could not be disgraced.

"SHH! And because I couldn't kill him." Deryn could not believe how week she was.

"Kill who, and why you, Mammy?"

She thought, "So innocent, my little girl. Who calls me Mammy, and has a good and proper Da. Not Alek. He... used me."

"Kill the emperor." She couldn't kill him, and now her sides loss was her fault.

"Why?" Always why.

"If I had, my side would have won. He promised me if I didn't kill him, He promised me..." They were sitting on Aileen's bed.

"Promised you WHAT?" said her cute little girl, angelically.

"Promised me... Promised me there would be peace. Equality. Fabs would be allowed. I would fly. That I would..." To painful to think about for Deryn to think about it, and Aileen was to young.

"That you would what, Mammy?" If only you knew. But you are too young. So every day, you ask. And get the same answer.

"..." She couldn't speak. She couldn't cry. She was weak, but she had to act strong. She could not be strong, only act. She thought, "Oh please, Patrick, take care of this."

"Da, why is Mammy so sad?" Da, Patrick, the man who kept his promises.

"Patrick, don't tell her. She's too young." She was too young. To young to know about why I had nightmares, too young to know why I wouldn't tell her some things. Things that were now traitorous to say.

"Aileen, we will tell you when you will understand. You don't want nightmares, do you?" Patrick was perfect. He always listen to her, knew that some things were too horrific to tell, and know and accept that she wasn't pure still. All of Alek's promises. Gone, all but forgotten now. She had made her choice and had to live with it.

"OK Da, Mammy. Kissy? Huggy? Tuck-me-iny?" Aileen, finishing their nightly ritual, of asking, denying, and then sleeping.

"Of course my dear. I will always." Aileen was half Deryn's life.

"I always will." And Patrick was the other half.

No Alek, even after all his promises.

* * *

Patrick means stone, and Deryn(Mammy) needs a stone. I'm too kind to her. Yes, they are married. No, Alek won't cause any... riffs between them.

Central powers: Clankers

Allied powers: Darwinists

Yes, I will continue my other stories. I just couldn't get this out of my head. Also, this will be continued. Some time.

And THANK YOU FOR READING! Your Awesome!


	4. Cont The wrong side won

I know that I switched POVs, I didn't like the first person, it sounded to self-pitying. Please Review! I would appreciate any sort of comment, especially constructive criticism. Thank you to all who have reviewed all ready!

Summery: Alek is a terrible person... or is he? Yes, he is.

* * *

They had lost. And now she had to tell her beloved daughter, Aileen why. Why her Mammy was a coward. Why there where no more beasties.

Deryn was in the kitchen, sitting down, and Aileen was engaged, and at only 16. Just like she had before... Before... Deryn new she must remember, for her daughter's sake. It was shameful, yes. But Patrick had been able to look past all of that, and they had raised Aileen to do the same. The young man Aileen would be marrying was quite a nice young man, but Deryn couldn't shake the suspicions she had, that he would take away Aileen's purity and then leave her. Like... Like... You must think about it Deryn, or you will never be able to tell her. She is old enough now. It was 10 years since Aileen had first asked, "Why, Mammy?"

Aileen was coming in the door, so happy she was radiant. She was so happy. Why should Deryn spoil that with her tales of woe? Because she was old enough to know.

"Aileen, please come into the kitchen. We have to- I have something to tell you. Something very important." she said. At least now she would have to tell her, and that was half the battle.

"Coming, Mammy! I am saying good bye to Gregor. Bye! See you tomorrow!" called Aileen.

And then she heard a lower voice, it must be Gregor, saying, "Good-Bye, Lee"

Aileen came into the kitchen. She had to tell her now.

"What, Mammy?"

"Aileen, this is going to be shocking for you. And a little painful for me. But I will tell you everything." Deryn heard herself say.

"What, Mammy?"

Deryn took a deep, heaving breath. And started to talk. "It is about the great war. What you always wanted to know. Why I had to kill the emperor. But first you must understand, we were the two best friends in the world. He told me everything, and eventually, I did too. We were both aboard the Leviathan, and the adventures we had! It was wonderful. But then... Then..." She had to stop. It was too painful.

Aileen said, "You don't have to tell me, Mammy."

But Deryn had to. No matter how painful it was.

Deryn heard herself say, "No. You have to know. You already know that I disguised myself, but I never told you that he found out. I was already in love with him when Alek found out. He was mad at first, but we eventually became friends again and then more than friends, and then we were- No, I was- so caught up in it that he was able to use me, because while I felt love, he felt lust, because I was forbidden. He, The Emperor of The League of Clankers*, Alekzander, used me. He promised me that we could be together. He proposed. Then..."

Aileen looked shocked. Stunned.

There was a long silence.

Until Aileen spoke. "Mammy, is this true? Don't continue if hurts you. Please, Mammy, don't. Please. Ple-"

Deryn had to continue. She had to. "No. I have to. Don't worry, Da knows. But only the not-pure part. And you are Da's child, not Alek's. But, then, the clankers started winning. They were banding behind Alek. Since I was so close to Alek, they told me to kill him. Alek trusted I was under his spell, and was completely not suspicious of me. I told the captain no, and why. Because I was a girl. I told him to kick me off the ship. But then he said that if I killed Alek, I could choose his method of going, poison, maybe, with it's quick and almost-painless death. He could offer no promises if I didn't. He also said I could stay aboard, even though I was a girl, if I only killed Alek. But I thought I loved him. So I helped him escape. Saying I had pushed him off the side of the ship. But I hadn't. And then the clankers banded behind Alek, and won. There wasn't even time for me to be kicked off. Count Volgar, they have taught you of him, have they not, thought I needed an award. So that I would keep Alek's and mine old relationship under wraps. But the barking emperor, because he was emperor then, sai-"

"Mammy, stop. Now." Aileen looked very worried.

Deryn knew she mustn't. "No! I must tell you. He said I was not to be rewarded. He wanted me killed, for the secret I carried, for the promise from him to marry me. I still have the ring. Volgar saved me, he helped me escape, before I was killed. I came to this town, a few weeks after my escape, and saw all the dead beasties. Saw your Da, who I didn't know, and asked him what was happening. He said the emperor ordered them all killed. Volgar had tried to stop it, I actually still keep a correspondence with him. He sent me a letter that even Bovril was killed. Bovril! Bovril was like the third person to our trio. And he had him murdered. Anyhow, I saw your Da, and he saw me wandering, and he took me in. We were married in a month. I only told him the non-virgin part, and he didn't pry. We really do love each other, your Da and I. We re-"

"Mammy. STOP. You will hurt yourself." Aileen was looking at her like she was crazy. It didn't matter.

Deryn had to continue. "NO! I must, you don't understand. I must. All these years, Alek has haunted me. Your Da knew it was best not to pry. He didn't. But I had to tell you. Are you sure Gregor is not using you?"

"Mammy, I'm sure. We love each other very much." Aileen said, seeming almost ecstatic that Deryn had stopped talking.

"That's good, very good Aileen. I love you very much. I love your Da very much. I love you both. Very, very much. Goodb-" And Deryn fell out of her chair.

"Mammy, are you alright?" Deryn thought about how fuzzy Aileen looked.

"Mammy! Mammy! Are you alright?" Deryn thought how her vision kept shrinking, but she didn't care.

"Da! Da! Gregor! Anyone! Mammy's hurt! Someone! Help! PLEASE!" Aileen looked to be weeping, but Deryn couldn't really tell. Not with the blackness.

Aileen looked over at her Mammy. She was on the ground. Da and Gregor came rushing in, saw Deryn, and took her to the nearest hospital, with Aileen jogging behind them, tellling them everything.

* * *

They arrived in the hospital, and recived the verdict.

Deryn was alive.

In a coma.

They didn't have enough money.

Someone came running in, saying he had the money.

They accepted.

* * *

Deryn saw nothing, heard nothing, and felt nothing, but black. Peaceful, calming, black.

And now Da, Gregor, Aileen, and some strangers mourned her passing into black.

The release of everything had all but killed her. But it brought her some peace.

Not dead, but black.

Was there hope?

Probably not.

* * *

But the stranger still payed.

But all she saw was black.

Would she wake up?

That was anyone's guess.

And everyone was crying, and mourning, and still, all she saw was black.

Yet the paying stranger had hope.

* * *

*NEW COUNTRY! Since this is completely alternative history, I got to name a new country! Hee-hee.

The end of this fanfic- unless people want me to cont., but 99% the end. Deryn is not dead, but in a coma, and I say they have, with there medical knowledge, a way to keep comatose patients alive.

And this is a lot like Ella enchanted, but without the gushy ending.

And I know Deryn trails off a lot. It is Post-Traumatic-Stress-disorder(Or me being really uncreative).


	5. And Deryn is still in a coma

Alek is a jerk. He's not the stranger. HE TRIED TO HAVE HER EXECUTED... or rather I did. *hides, and cowers* heh... heh... moving on...

* * *

Blackness... for 3 years.

Peace... but not true peace.

* * *

3 years.

And the stranger payed for every one of them.

They tried to ask him who he was, but he never replied.

He was Austrian, and Aileen asked him, "Are you Alek?"

"No."

And he wasn't lying.

* * *

Cliffhanger! Don't kill me! I have science Olympiad, scholastic bowl, Silly Strings, MCYO, regular cello, HW, more HW, and ISATs just finished, so even MORE hw. It may be a few weeks, and Alek WILL be a jerk in following chapters, never to repent... the war has made his mind icy and special(UGLIES!)

Please don't kill me,  
Fleabird6


	6. The end

I take back my statement, Alek does repent.

It is omnipresent, Volgar, Alek then Deryn POV. Last chapter, Part 1.

* * *

It was the day Alek decided to follow Count Volgar. Every Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday, he would leave the palace at 3 pm and come back at 7 pm.

That was the last day she would see the current black.

But at least the black was easy.

* * *

Volgar arrived at the hospital at 3:25 sharp like always. He couldn't help it. This girl had loved Alek, truly loved him. And then Alek had ordered her executed. After all the sacrifices Deryn had made for him. He paid for her hospital bills, seeing as of all the debt he owed her.

He had come to admire Deryn, how she had rebuilt her life after all Alek had done too her, after all the war had done to her. Yes, he did admire her. Funny how it had used to be Alek admiring and he, Volgar, scorning.

And although she had though he only had news directly from her, Volgar had kept some people on his payroll to watch her, and make sure there was no trouble. The first few years after the escape, his main worry was her telling somebody. Now his main worry was Alek finding out where she was.

But he had made a small mistake.

Being to regular.

And having a _too_ good alibi.

* * *

So Alek had followed Volgar to the hospital, where unknown to him, he had caused his first(and not surprisingly only) friend and first(and surprisingly only) lover to have fallen into a coma.

He had been sorry the moment after giving the order. But Monarchs must appear strong, so he couldn't reverse it.

He had wanted to, had wanted to feel her back in his arms. But he couldn't

Alek supposed now that the war had been very hard on him. But that was no excuse for his actions.

But still, he was a very good actor.

* * *

Deryn saw black.

But she heard voices, as always. They always seemed to be there, but she knew they weren't.

There were nurses, who she always ignored.

There was her husband's, Patrick's, who was there the most often.

There was Aileen's, who came when she could.

There was Gregor's Aileen's husband. They had married soon after her seeing black. Or 'coma' as the nurses called it.

There was Melwyn's#, her granddaughter, who was always sweet sounding.

There was Tamryn's*, Melwyn's twin, who was a boy, and always timid. Rarely did she hear his voice.

There was Volgar's too. She was still surprised at how good of friends they had become.

But then today, there was someone new.

It was Alek's voice.

She hadn't heard that voice for 21** years. She had forgiven him, yes. But that didn't mean she wasn't still mad at him.

* * *

AN: I know I'm not supposed to have one in the middle of a story, but there are a few things that need to be explained.

I have this in two parts because it will make a LOT more sense if you think a little about all the characters' thoughts and feelings before continuing.

*means 'twin'

#means 'as fair as honey'  
(these meanings taken off internet, no clue if they are true.)

**COMPLETE ESTIMATION!

Also, Please don't kill me. This is a tragedy.

Last chapter, part 2

* * *

So she woke up. With a very loud scream

At first, she was startled, seeing all this bright light, and all these faces over her, her husband's, her daughters, her grandchildren's, and Volgar's faces. Who knew she would be happy to see Volgar?

Aileen was more beautiful than she had ever imagined. Her grandchildren were simply perfect. They would be... how old?

"What happened? Where is the black?"

Her husband spoke. "You were in a coma."

But for how long? She had a head-ache and no time-line. "How long?"

"Three years."

Three years? That was expensive! How could they afford that? "How could you afford that?"

"I paid." Said Volgar. Yes, Volgar had. Alek wouldn't have, even if they had married.

Alek.

His voice.

Her waking up.

Pure fury washed over her.

"Alek! How dare you. Go away."

"Deryn, please, I can explain!" Alek was pleading.

"Take the children out please, Patrick, Gregor, Aileen. And alert the doctor to my state."

The took the children, and themselves, out.

* * *

Leaving Volgar, Alek, and her in the room.

"How can you explain a death order? Killing all the beasties? Killing _Bovril_? Not caring if I was with child? Not barking marrying me? Do you know that I had a miscarriage? Of our son. He died, because the guards beat me. How can you explain barging in here? Are you going to give me another execution date? Then go barking ahead, you bum-rag." She stared defiantly at him.

"I can explain, please, give me a chance!" he pleaded.

"Fine, you have a minute to convince me that everything you have ever said isn't clart." She felt like clart, with her head-ache.

So he started. "I was afraid. The politics were unstable. There seemed nothing I could do. I had to be cold and calculating, and maintain a superior attitude. Killing you... would have made sure I was never seen as a Darwinist sympathizer. I did not know you were pregnant, or that the guards would be that brutal. I came to find out what Volgar was doing. And I wouldn't give you another death order. If you haven't noticed, the only one I had ever issued was for you."

"And I suppose I should feel grateful that I was the only one privileged enough to get a death order from the emperor himself?"

"I am quite ashamed of my behavior." Of course you should be, you ninny.

"Of course you should be, you ninny. What man makes love with a woman, and then orders her _killed_? Or is so power hungry, he care for no one but himself?"

"I am sorry. For everything. Will you forgive me?" Him, ask for forgiveness?

"I already have." Many years ago.

"I have only acted, from that night when you 'killed' me. It has only been acting. And I have loved you too." That seemed truthful, but...

"No, you haven't. Loved me, that is. Love overcomes all things. Patrick loves me. Aileen loves me. Volgar loves me. But not you." Or did he?

"Yes, I have. I had to hide it." Coward.

"No, Love overcomes all things. You only lusted." After every lass in the world.

"Why do you think I never married?"

"I have had my thoughts." Quite a few of them. He was only the most powerful person in the world.

Volgar decided to speak up. "Please, children, be civilized. And I fear I am to blame. If I had never made your love forbidden, this would have never happened. If I had never taught Alek so well, this would have never happened."

"At least you tried to fix things." She and Alek had spoke at the same time.

She felt some closure wash over her.

"Bring the others in." Love did overcome all things, eventually.

* * *

The others came in- except the doctor, who had not showed up yet. She still had a head-ache.

All her feelings came tumbling out. "I love you, all of you. I always have. I've heard all of you in my coma. I heard news of your engagement. Of your marriage. I heard Tamryn and Melwyn being born, growing up. I heard you all crying. I heard you, Patrick, talking to me. I heard Volgar explaining politics to me. And recently, I heard Alek talking, which is what woke me up. I wanted to yell at him, and tell him he was forgiven. He is. You can figure everything out together. My only regret is not seeing all of you more. But I love you. All of you. Goodbye. I love you. I lov-"

And black again.

But not pure black.

This time there was a light.

A small speck.

Growing bigger.

It looked to be a tunnel.

She crawled through.

* * *

They were already in the hospital, and received the doctor finally came.

They received the verdict.

Deryn was dead.

Not in a coma.

They didn't have enough money for a good, decent funeral.

No-one came running in, saying he had the money.

That someone was already in the room.

They accepted.

* * *

It was Deryn Sharp's, who had died at age 39, funeral.

The Emperor of The League of Clankers had paid. The people were shocked.

They were driving to the cemetery, Patrick, Aileen, Gregor, Tamryn, Melwyn, Volgar, and Alek were all riding in the first car, an open top-buggy.

There was a assassin in the crowd.

He shot at the hearse, the bullet breaking the window and going through Deryn's torso, through the simple burial shroud she had requested.

The second bullet hit Melwyn, right threw the heart. At least it was quick.

The third bullet hit Volgar, in his femoral artery. It was a relatively quick, but painful death.

The forth bullet hit Patrick, in the arm, when he was blocking Aileen.

The fifth bullet hit Patrick, too, but in the head, straight through the eye, again while he was trying to protect Aileen.

The sixth and last bullet hit Gregor, entering by her ear.

Melwyn, Volgar, Patrick and Gregor all died.

Not the one the gunner had been aiming for, Aleksander. The one he had been aiming for for 40-something years. He was the one who had killed the emperor's parents. But he could not kill that boy, at least not yet. It infuriated him to no end.

* * *

Aileen, Tamryn and he all were left to morn their loved one's passing. They were an odd sort of family.

Deryn was buried a week later, with all that had been killed during her funeral.

Deryn and Patrick buried together, holding Melwyn.

Volgar buried on his own, never having a wife.

But the deceased's lives were easier. They didn't have to live with the 'What-ifs?' and the guilt.

His acting skills were coming into good use.

* * *

THE END!

Can you believe it is the end?

If anyone has any constructive criticism, it would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks to all who have read, and to those who have reviewed.

Don't kill me... please.


	7. Different, happy, story LadyLord

This is for challenge #2, Obviously not Scott Westerfeld. SLIGHT PARODY! Everything is Deryn's POV, written like it was the book, Deryn is the 'she', Dr. Barlow is never refered to as she.

This is a one-shot, completely unrelated to the other 3 stories I am working on.

Summery:

* * *

She could not believe it. The barking war was over! _And_ she was the barking hero. Or rather barking Dylan was. No one knew, with Jaspert being killed, and she could not even mourn him like a girl. She had to be his pall bearer. He would not see the honor that she- a lass!- had earned. She was about to be made a Lord! Her mum would be so happy! She had even invited them, her mum and aunties, only her auntie was her mum, and her mum was an auntie. Oh well.

Alek was going to be there too. She hadn't seen him since he had had to leave the Leviathan for diplomatic purposes. He still didn't know. She finished getting dressed in her dress uniform. He should know. I'll tell him today, she thought.

The ceremony was to start in 10 minutes when a knock on the door interrupted her pacing.

"Who barking is it?" she called.

"It's me, Alek." replied Alek.

"Then come in! I haven't seen you for... for how long?" She said as Alek opened the door.

"2 years." Alek said, looking sorry for such a long time.

Deryn was so happy, she almost forgot to act like a boy- now man, when she said, "Aye, it doesn't matter. Lovely to see you today. I bet you are barking glad your best friend is not going to be a commoner any more."

"Our children can marry then!" exclaimed Alek, not realizing how much he had wounded her by, if he had children, by marrying another woman.

"When did you get married? AND WHY WASN'T I INVITED?" She could not believe he would not invite her!

Alek looked confused, then said, "I'm not married."

"YOU HAD CHILDREN WITH A WOMAN AND YOU DID NOT MARRY HER?" Really, for a prince, he could be thick.

"I haven't had any children yet." Said Alek.

"YOU LEFT A PREGNANT, WHO YOU HAVE NOT MARRIED, GIRL AT YOUR BARKING CASTLE IN AUSTRIA BY HERSELF?" The nerve!

"I will let you know I have not made anyone pregnant."

"YOU HAD... you know... WITH A WOMAN AND YOU DID NOT BARKING MARRY HER, YOU BUM-RAG!" Where was Volgar during all of this? He was slightly sane, when he was not threatening her.

Alek started to giggle, then chuckle, then started rolling on the floor, laughing.

"DO YOU THINK THIS IS A LAUGHING MATTER?" What type of dummkoft was he?

Gasping, he said, "Ich ... habe nicht... einen ...speziellen Freundin.* "

"In plain English, not clanker, please." This was getting out of hand.

"I don't have a girlfriend!" She suddenly felt really stupid. She thought he was talking about now, when he was really talking about far into the future.

"Why do you care, anyway?" Alek inquired.

"Because then... look at the time! Ceremony starts in 5 minutes! Got to go!" She really needed to get out of there. She started running, glancing once behind herself and seeing Alek was looking at her strangely.

* * *

7 minutes later...

Volgar, Barlow, King George, Dery, and Alek are all in the throne room, and Deryn is about to be made a Lord.

"We are here to see the honored Midshipman Dylan be turned into a Lord. Correct any mistakes in this honor at any time," Said King George.

She new she had to say something now, or things would get even more messy. "Excuse me, King George, but you made two mistakes. I'm Deryn, and I should become a Lady, not a Lord."

There was dead silence, until Alek started laughing, again, but this time saying, "Good one!"

No, it was not a joke. But I could pass it off a such. No. I had to tell. "I am, indeed, a lass. Do you need me to prove it?"

There was another dead silence, until Alek spoke, "You are a girl?"

"Aye, I'm a girl. Are you going to make me a Lady, Lord, or nothing?" She said.

King George said, "Maybe we need some time to think this all over..."

Dr. Barlow said, "Lets go out for lunch.", while looking pointedly at Count Volgar.

Volgar said, "Yes.. Yes... that could... work.. if you want to go to lunch.. Yes.. Yes..."

King George said, "But what about Dy-Deryn?"

Volgar said, "It is your problem."

Alek said, "I hereby appoint you Lady of the Austrian court."

King George said, "That works."

Volgar said, "WHY ME?"

Dr. Barlow said, "Lunch time, men."

She said, "Ah-hem."

Alek said, "Will you marry me?"

She said, "Are you sure you don't have a pregnant girl in Austria?"

Dr. Barlow, Volgar, and King George all said, "WHAT DID YOU DO ALEK?"

Alek said, "NOTHING! Dyl-Deryn is convinced I impregnated a girl in Austria."

She said, "Just making sure." And kissed him.

* * *

And then all the happily ever after blah happened.

* * *

*"I do not have a special friend." Blame babel fish, if it is wrong. He is laughing so hard he reverts to German. Thanks to Esprit D'escalier for pointing out that I used the wrong word! I take Spanish, so I'm clueless.

Side note: I DID NO RESEARCH! Shame on me. Sorry if it insults any one in Great Briton, I had an idea, and no time.

This was uncharacteristically happy. Sorry.

*Edited to hopefully make more clear*

THANK YOU FOR READING!


	8. Dead: Really, Really short, I know

His best friend, Dylan, was dead.

Died in a watch huxley, shot in the chest.

And now it was his funeral.

* * *

Alek was standing out side of St Aloysius Catholic Church*, in Glasgow, Scotland. It was 2 on a Wednesday afternoon, and he was stealing himself to go in and see all of Dylan's relatives, mourning. But he had to go, see his friend off. It was a lot of trouble getting here.

Dylan had ironical died in the last battle of the war**, he was so close to coming home. But now that Alek thought about it, Dylan was not looking forward to going home. Alek wondered why.

After he had mustered his courage, Alek opened the door to 25 Rose St*, seeing all of Dylan's relatives crying.

They all looked up at him. This was awkward he thought.

"Um... Hello?"

They parted to let him see the casket.

He first saw his friends face, so intense in life, now lifeless. Then he saw Dylan's burial clothing. It was a handsome sky-blue dress. He could not believe how dead- A DRESS?

"Um... why is Dylan wearing a dress?"

"Dylan... Who's Dylan?" Was the general reply.

And then the preacher stood up. "We are gathered here today to commemorate the death of Deryn Sharp while on-board the Leviathan, in service to our country. Deryn gave-"

"-You mean Dylan, right? And why is he wearing a dress?" Had he come to the wrong funeral?

The preacher replied, "No I mean Deryn. She was a girl, who joined the military and served and helped our country in many ways."

"HE'S A GIRL?" He thought he must have been poisoned! How could Dylan, practically the pinnacle of masculinity, be a girl?

A woman who identified herself as Deryn's mom said, "Of course she is."

"AND NO ONE'S TOLD ME?", Seriously, these people need to tell him important facts like that sooner.

Volgar shook his head and said, "I tried to tell you"

"BARKING LOT OF GOOD TRYING DID, DUMMKOFT!"  
Really, he deserved to know important facts like:  
The day of the week  
If he was emperor  
Who is still alive  
What he was having for breakfast-Eggs or oatmeal  
If he was supposed to be a Darwinist or Clanker  
Who was trying to kill him  
His best friends gender

The preacher interrupted his chain of thought, right as he was adding 'Was my mother a rightie or a leftie' by saying, "And now as we..."

The preacher continued on as he overheard Dr. Barlow whisper to Volgar ,"I found out before you did."

This was too big to go unnoticed. "AND YOU DIDN'T BARKING TELL ME EITHER?"

The preacher was very annoyed by this point. "Ahem! As I was saying-"

* * *

*actual church/street in Glasgow  
**Did not look up.

NOTE: I made the preacher be rude just cause. I do not think that pastors are rude, or that religion is wrong. Please take no offense.

This turns into an extreme parody! Do you want to see it?

Yes, I will update Newkirk's and Jaspert, and finish the drabble at the beginning of this story-thingy. Sorry, I get distracted by new, shiny projects VERY, VERY easily. And this story is like a comet pulled from orbit, as it passes the sun...

Thank you for Reading, and please review!


	9. Moltov

The Molotov Scenario (originally appeared on westerforem), self explanatory, Alek POV, Deryn, then Deryn

_But _I have a really dark one next, and I would like someone to beta it.

EDITED! Hopefully better...

* * *

It was the middle of the night when he heard the knocking.

He had opened his door to see his friend Dylan, looking frantic. Dylan said, "Aye. Your up. You've got to barking escape again. I'll come with you, so will Volgar and Bovril."

He was still sleepy, and doubted it was morning yet. "What? It is morning?"

Dylan, being frank as par usual, simply said, "Just get your bum-rag bum out of that bed. We have to go. Meet me at the location in 4 minutes, ready to go."

5 minutes later, he had reached the rendezvous point where Dylan and Volgar were waiting.

"Your late" "You barking ninny, YOUR LATE!" chorused Volgar and Dylan, in respective order.

"Sorry..." All because of him, the plan could be ruined- Again.

"Doesn't matter. All ready to repel? Ready Alek?" scoffed Dylan.

He thought he was ready- until he saw their escape route. "Are you sure this is-" He had felt a push. And then the ground was rushing at him. In the name of the Holy Roman Empire were they sure this was "saaafffeeeee?"

* * *

Volgar had said to her, "So much for being quiet."

After that occured, Volgar, herself, and Bovril all repealed down the rope after Alek.

Bovril had looked mighty cute repealing, she had thought. Except when his bum landed on your face. And he had just so happened to be so excited that he had needed to pee.

Deryn knew she had to take control, even if she had pee on her face. "I am alive. Everyone still alive? Good. Now we need to go Northeast." She had started to walk.

Volgar, who was actually using a compass had said, "That so happens to be the direction of south south east."

Maybe it would be best for Volgar to lead, since he was the one who had actually thought to bring a compass along. She had then blushed, embarrassed at her blunder, and had said, "Aye. Then you lead."

Alek, being clueless and tired, had said, "What is going on?"

"Are you still not awake? Is there any poison?" One time she found him running through the flechette bat room screaming about poison. Strange things, one hears these days.

"Oh. north east." He appeared lost in thought, maybe thinking of that incident, or maybe about the one where he went to the lady boffin's room and thought she was his mom.

* * *

They had walked for a week. And then a villager had spotted them. Oh, the stupidity! Well, this actually was her first time doing something this stupid. Apparently, Volgar and Alek had come across similar troubles before, before she had met them.

Still, she knew what she had to do. "We've been spotted by the Darwinists. Alek, run." Alek had to be saved.

Volgar started to rummage through his bag- who knows what is in there? Hopefully something useful was in there.

And then Alek, being an unreasonable dummkopf, whisper-screamed, "NO! I can't leave you! You'll be hanged for sure!"

Volgar, being a reasonable bum-rag for once said, "She won't. She has a trick up her sleeve she hasn't told you."

Alek said, "I will not run until you tell me." He really was a dummkoft. He missed the oh-so-obvious shes that Volgar had said.

"Run. I'll tell you later." If you don't get yourself killed, ninny.

She observed how the proceeding moments turned out to be an awkward silence.

Finnally breaking the silence, Volgar said, "I've found the... CURSE! The Clankers have spotted us. Dylan, pour this into this. Alek, RUN!" Volgar handed her a foul smelling liquid, a hankie, and a bottle.

"No." Defiant prince, always having their trouble stages. There was only one solution to this problem. She had to tell him.

"Fine. I'll tell you. I'm a girl. NOW RUN!" Then he barking _balked_ at her.

"What?"

She gritted her teeth. "A girl. My name is Deryn."

"I can't leave you hear! You'll still be hanged!" Barking ninnies and their clart.

Volgar, preventing further argument, commanded, "Throw the bottles."

He had lit the hankies. Burning hankies! They smelt like poop. "What are these things? They smell like clart! They don't hang girls, you barking ninny."

"Moltov cocktails. Gasoline, bottle, and handkerchief."

"Oh. How do we escape?" said Alek. _Finally_ seeing some reason.

Time to be the hero. She didn't have to see reason, only him. "We don't. You and Volgar escape."

"NO!" Being a hero works a lot better when you are not near a prince.

"Deryn, You run with Alek. I was correct. You two will work out fine." Or Volgar could be the hero... she REALLY had not seen that coming.

"But-" The barking prince. They had to get out of there, and quick.

"No buts. NOW RUN!" screamed the hero.

So they ran... leaving Volgar behind, to fend for himself.

And she had one last thought as she was running. What was she? Not the hero, not the prince.

The damsel in distress? Well, at least she new how to make Moltov Cocktails.

* * *

They wound up making it. Not Volgar. He was gunned down by a townswoman, but as they had ran away, he had slipped another letter to Alek. A very interesting letter...


	10. Les Misrebales

Song fics- I think? E went through for grammar afterwards. These are all from "Les Miserables"

I still need a beta reader for the next one...

Notice to the person who said, "I think your beta needs a beta" I haven't been using a beta, so I was asking for one. I went back and (Hopefully) FIXED IT ALL MYSELF. At least leave a name, then your all important opinion won't be deleted.

THANK YOU! To all the people who alerted me to my bad grammer, I really appreciate it! I think it is better now!

But enough rambling!

* * *

Empty chairs at every table Alek POV

"There's a grief that can't be spoken" he had told Volgar.

He had barely had been able to say that much, through the pain. He had known dieing would hurt, but not this much.

He already had a list of people who would not see tomorrow.

Dr. Barlow. Dead.

Newkirk. Dead.

Rigby. Dead.

Deryn. Dead.

Him. Almost, and as good as dead.

He could see his fathers phantom face, and his mothers, and Deryn's. They all were drinking at a table, and they had a list. Titled, "Ways we have saved you".

And it went on, and on...

* * *

Do you here the people sing? Alek POV

Yes, he did here the angry men. He was overthrown, but it didn't seem to matter to some. He longed to see Dylan's world, not this world of angry men, the one of politics.

He heard the drums.

He stood up.

He was in disguise, to over throw himself. How ironic. Volgar was dead, killed by these imbeciles

He said that was his reason for enlisting, but it really was to escape, and have adventure.

* * *

I dreamed a dream Deryn POV

She could not believe this persons words. That the only way was to kill Alek.

But she was living in a dream, a dream of peace.

But was this life worth living? With out anyone to talk to? Or were those only aspirations of the young?

So she sat in a tavern, in a taboo, because she had had to be _ransomed_.

Alone...

But if she would join this group to overthrow Aleksander, who had won the war. And took their child, who loved gears more than animals.

But she could still dream of their time together, and of the future.

One with her child if he was over thrown.

But she drank in silence, alone. Life had killed that dream she once dreamed, to be great and mighty. Now she was worthless. Why had they ransomed her?

* * *

Master of the House Emperor Franz Josef POV

He was the master of the house. Not that peculiar boy, Aleksander. He was still in charge. And would remain so.

He would continue to swindle the common people out of their money and blame his nephew.

Emperor Franz Joseph didn't care. It wasn't his problem, only his gain. He could do it without any retributions.

And he could get that infernal boy assassinated while he was at. Throw him in a river maybe...

Or turn public opinion against him. That would be near impossible though. The public loved that flying woman, Deryn.

What if he killed Deryn and blamed it on Alek?

He was master of the house after all, and he was allowed to have his own dreams.

The only problem was finding someone to do the dirty work. It seemed everyone loved that flying woman, not him, the master of the house.

Everyone should like him, their landlord, or something bad could happen to them.

Or someone they loved.


End file.
